The Highest Meralco Bill I ever paid!

It was a good thing that summer is over so makaka move on na tayo sa pag a unlimited aircon hindi ba mommies?

When Daryl and I started living together, we of course have been paying our own bills. I am so glad that we now have wonderful jobs that give us food on our plate and enough money for our needs. Bonus na lang kung merong pang 'wants'. Anyway, our ac unit is broken since last year after summer. It broke exactly the first week of rainy season so hindi ko na muna sya ipinagawa dahil tag-ulan naman na. The problem was the frion. Hindi lumalamig yung unit because it ran out of Frion na daw. Since June last year, we contented ourselves na walang ac. Okay naman, nabuhay naman kami because the weather was not that humid unlike kapag summer months talaga diba?

Fast forward to late March when summer started, grabe hirap na hirap na kami matulog. Our room has a direct sunlight in the afternoon so imagine the humidity inside our room when the sun sets. Sobrang init talaga! Daryl and I decided to get the ac fixed. We contacted someone via Facebook which happened to be our schoolmate in High School.

We were charged Php3,300 ata which includes the total renovation of our ac. Inayos pa kasi yung mismong makina dahil butas butas na daw (he showed us naman na totoong sira na) plus the Frion charging and cleaning. Pikit-mata na lang sa pagbabayad kahit over budget ng Php800. Hahaha! Our budget kasi was only Php2,500 to get it fixed pero dahil no choice na rin naman, inisip na lang namin na magiging maalwan na ang pagtulog namin sa gabi.

Finally!! Goodnight sleep na latuurrrr!!😌😌 #imjweekends

A post shared by Jen Alipio (@its_mommy_jen) on Apr 14, 2018 at 1:29am PDT

Or so I thought.

Came April, the appliance usage was soaring high!

Late night use of TV which usually only up to 10pm. By that time, umaabot ata ng 1am.
Almost everyday na pag gamit ng washing machine (dryer).
Nataon pang night shift si Daryl so meaning, he has to use the ac in the afternoon to be able to sleep well sa hapon. And since sobrang init nga, I let them be para na rin kay Jami. He tends to stay inside our room kapag naka on ang ac.

I was really nervous come end of April when our Meralco bill usually arrives. I was expecting it to be more or less Php 2,500+. Our usual bill was Php 1,000 to Php1,300 during cold weather months while it goes up to Php 2,500 every summer months. When the bill came? Halos maiyak ako! Hahaha!

Pinaka nakakatakot na nakita ko! Mas scary pa sa insidious 1!! 😱😱Tumaas ang balahibo ko at kinabahan ng todo! 😨😨 Para akong nanlamig sa takot, tipong binuhusan ka ng malamig na tubig habang nakatitig sa maliit na papel na ito. Iyak na mga momshies!! 😭😭Musta bill nyo? 🤯🤯🤒🤒 #infinitybills #meralcobill #budgetruined

A post shared by Jen Alipio (@its_mommy_jen) on May 28, 2018 at 5:58am PDT

Don't be fooled, dalawang bill talaga yan. We had one that's due since last month for Php 1,800+ plus the new bill of Php 3,500+.

Even so, I was so surprise to see na sobrang tumaas yung bill from Php 2,500 with ac usage (previous summer months) to Php 3,500 for only a month this year! I was told tumaas nga din daw talaga ang singil ng kuryente. When I posted this photo of our bill, ang daming naka relate! So basically nag taasan nga lahat and almost everyone had the same horror story.

I was just glad that summer months are over and we are starting to have rains. I remember when I was younger, tuwang-tuwa ako kapag summer, ngayon sobrang scared ko na kasi ang taas ng bill ng kuryente! hahahah! It wasn't that hot in the afternoon anymore so no ac usage while we limit to only 3-4 hours come night time. We also watched the usage of every appliances at home and make sure they are turned off when not in use. I am expecting it will lower down to Php2,000+ for the month of May 25 to June 24 cut off.

How about you guys? What are your Meralco bills horror story? =)

Family Trials

You know, I really love the month of June!

Aside from it being my birth month, I felt I receive more trials during this time of year, every year.

Hahaha! Exage! But yes, that's what I usually feel whenever my birthday comes.

The past couple of weeks, I was really stressed. Although we received good news too, I can't keep being happy for too long because of other things that we have to face.

Well, instead of dwelling into those negative things, I'll share with you those that are good ones. Sabi nga nila diba? Don't dwell on negativity. Be happy and the universe will conspire to make your wishes come true.

Char! Ako lang nag imbento nyan, but sort of like that yung mga kasabihan diba? Hahaha.

On June 14th, we had the chance to celebrate my birthday. I wasn't really expecting anymore since we have a lot of things to bear in mind first but Daryl, as he always does, want to make sure that I'll get to celebrate my birthday. We were originally planning to eat in Vikings but decided to eat somewhere else to save money.

Birthday Dinner! Thank you Daddy! Sobrang thoughtful mo kaya love na love kita kahit binubwisit mo ko lage hahaha! 😁 #birthdaycelebrant

A post shared by Jen Alipio (@its_mommy_jen) on Jun 14, 2017 at 4:47am PDT

The past weekend, we celebrated Father's Day in advance. We ate in Bonchon kasi favorite ni Daryl yung Bibimbow nila. Also we bought school supplies for Jami.

Ang magulang na kayang kaya utuin ni Jami, Happy Father's Day, Babe! 😂😂We have a lot more trials to go through but our love for each other are much more than what life can throw at us. We love you Daddy!! 😘😘 And to my Papa whom I miss sooo much! 😭😭😭

A post shared by Jen Alipio (@its_mommy_jen) on Jun 17, 2017 at 4:54pm PDT

We decided to buy Jami's things in Robinson's Las Pinas para maiba lang. We always go to SM Southmall which at times, gets really crowded. I would say that mas madami lang talaga ang options in SM Southmall.

Getting ready for school!! Ganto pala ang feeling ng Nanay na first time papasok sa school ang anak. Matatae ka na lang sa excitement at gastos. 😂😂😂🤑🤑😭😭🤢🤢 #JamiAtSchool #JamiNursery1 #JamiMilestones #imjMommyDuties

A post shared by Jen Alipio (@its_mommy_jen) on Jun 17, 2017 at 12:23am PDT

Jami had his first day of school yesterday!! For the past two days that I am observing him, I'll blog about it in a separate post. This is a such a big milestone I have to document it. Hehehe!

Today marked another milestone for me and Jami. Our first day of school! 😁😁👍🏻👍🏻❤️❤️☺️ #imjMommyDuties #JamiAtSchool #JamiMilestones #JamiNursery1

A post shared by Jen Alipio (@its_mommy_jen) on Jun 19, 2017 at 2:29am PDT

While I was really happy with Jami's new endeavor, I am equally happy with Daryl's first day at work. =) He was finally called to start and signed the contract. I know that he's excited with this just like I am.

So there, these are the things that I am really glad about despite of all the trials that the family faces now. To give you a hint, one of it was the "looking for nanny immediately" part. Since Daryl now have a job, no one will look after Jami. We need one really soon! I am hoping we could find one who would really take care of him, yun bang may malasakit.

Oh God! Please help us.

Jami and the Tantrums

Couple of weekends ago, Jami and I fought.

I was really guilty about our encounter that I was thinking about it the next day and the day after. I even get teary eyed kapag naalala ko. I purposefully blogging about it just now so the emotions died down.

Why is it so hard to become a parent? I came to a point where I am so confused if what I am doing is still right.

Ganto kasi yan..

I was preparing our dinner while Jami was playing games on my phone. I asked him to stop playing because the battery's about to die and we're going to eat supper in minutes time. Ang siste, he got pissed because I asked him to stop playing.He got grumpy after tapos pa iyak-iyak and he got really demanding. Ang gusto nya dapat binibigay na agad, yung mga ganyan.

So eto na, Daryl and I were preparing for our dinner when he asked for dede. I said no immediately kasi kakain na nga. I want him to eat dinner first then he can have dede. After that, he got really cranky and crying. I got mad because I am at work the whole day and that I want things to become pretty easy for us both but he's not giving it. Sinubuan ko sya ng food while he was still crying.

Me: Anong nakakaiyak, Jami?! 

The sound of me was really pissed pero I managed not to shout.

Jami cried so loud, spit the food on his mouth. I got more annoyed tinapik ko yung mouth nya. He began to cry louder and went to his Daddy.

Nagpapa awa!

The tendecy is, the TV is on so when his attention get caught, mawawala na ang momentum and I felt makakalusot sya sa mga kalokohan nya so I turned the TV off. First thing first, I want to address his attitude.

That made everything worst. Jami was so angry, he screeched. 

I lost my temper. Ayaw ko pa naman ng sinisigawan ako. I carried him to our room so he can't see Daryl then asked him to face the wall.

Naglulupasay.

I carried him para makatayo sya on his own tapos pinaharap ko lang sa wall. He was still crying, shouting, wailing, I can see he's really mad. He was jumping up and down because of his anger as he looses his self control too. Na feel ko na parang sumosobra na sya so when I saw a thin long wood somewhere in our room, pinalo ko sya.. twice.. on his right leg. I guess it hurt because nag red ng slight yung part na tinamaan sya.

He was crying endlessly and still jumping up and down. I know galit na galit na din talaga sya. I started to think if what I am doing is right. I watched him and that made me really sad, guilty, worse and all the negative feeling in the world. He was sweating kasi nakapatay yung electric fan when we went inside so I asked him to sit down sa bed and turned on the fan in front of him.

I sat beside the fan and observed him. He was still crying pero nag minimize na. Pahikbi - hikbi na lang. Lumalakas ang iyak kapag naaalala nya siguro yung encounter. I let him continue his crying until mejo nagla lie low na sya.

I talked to him in a calm voice but I didn't loose the authority in it.

Me: "Bakit nagalit si Mommy?"

Jami: (sobbing) "Kase.. Kase.. Hmmm.. Kasi..Nag iyak ako eh."

Para akong kinurot sa puso. I don't want him to think na nagagalit ako when he cries. He felt that crying is bad. It was the other way around. I want him to feel that he could cry when he's sad, mad, etc. Lalaki sya and that I want him to grow up na hindi takot ilabas ang nararamdaman nya. Men have tendency to hide their feelings and that is something I want to avoid. I want him to be open with me and his Daddy.

I know at his age, he doesn't know how to handle his emotions and that leads to tantrums.

Me: "Hindi ako nagalit kasi nag iyak ka. Nagalit ako kasi sumisigaw ka. Hindi ka pwedeng sumigaw sa mas matanda sayo. Kahit kay Daddy or kay Nanay o kahit kanino hindi ka pwedeng sumigaw."

Jami: (nodding) "Opo.. opo.. opo.."

That's what he do kapag pinagsasabihan ko sya, opo lang ng opo. I don't even know kung naiintindihan ba nya or nage gets nya ang point pero opo lang yan ng opo. Minsan, nakakaloko kasi baka nag aagree lang para matapos na ang drama. Lol.

Me: "Bakit ako nagalit?"

I tried to repeat the question para malaman ko kung nakinig ba sya or he understands the message. He's still sobbing and I felt pity towards him. I don't know kung tama ba ang mga pinag gagawa ko, sa totoo lang.

I did my best to explain bakit ako nagalit. I want to make sure that he remembered everything and that he knows the moral lesson. Pinaulit - ulit ko ang tanong until he answered correctly na kaya ako nagalit because he was shouting at me.

Me: "Galit ka ba kay Mommy?"

Jami: (Umiiling)

Me: "Hindi ka galit kay Mommy? Ano lang?"

Jami: "Sad ako.. Hindi na ako Happy."

Hindi ko na kinaya, Bes. Maiyak-iyak ako. Of course the last thing us parents want to hear is that our kids being unhappy. What more if it's you who made them sad after all.

Naiiyak tuloy ako habang tinataype ko to. =(

Me: "Sad ka? Pero hindi ka galit kay Mommy?"

Jami: (umiiling)

Me: "Sure ka?"

Jami: "opo."

I guess being sad rather than angry at you is better.

We hugged after. He hugged me for a very long time. Yung hindi lang basta hug na wala lang, masabi lang na nag hug. He hugged me for a good 3-5 minutes. I let him hug me as long as he want. Parang ayaw na nga bumitaw. I can't recall if I said sorry to him but I make sure that he feels good after our little talk. If Daryl wasn't calling us (dahil kumakain kami when the drama started), baka hindi pa kami nag bitaw sa pag hug sa isa't -isa.

We went out of the room and continue our dinner when Nanay came in and took something from our house.

Nanay: "O anong nangyari jan, bakit umiyak yan?"

Me: "Eh di ginulpi ko." (Note: exaggeration)

Nanay: "Ayan ang martilyo o, pukpukin mo. Ano bang laban nyan sayo."

Wow. I definitely need that encouragement. I feel bad na nga, ganun pa ang sinabi sakin. That's when I felt worse, I can't stop thinking about it for a good 2 days. Thinking about it now, parang ganun din naman si Mama sa akin before less the talk after the drama. Did she feel the same way before to say that to me? Probably, Yes. Or maybe she's hurt too kasi apo nga naman nya yun.

As much as possible, I don't want to use corporal punishment. As long as I can make him follow me with just telling him what to do, ginagawa ko. But I guess, there are those days when you are so tired and you feel na sumusobra na din ang attitude nila so you have to use authority. For the last 3 and a half years of me being a Mommy to Jami, this is the third time na napalo ko sya. I am reserving this kind of discipline kapag alam kong sobra na. On many small things that go wrong, pinagsasabihan ko lang by telling him na bad yun, or don't do that kasi hindi maganda yun. The last thing I want is for him to grow up na walang respect sa mas matanda sa kanya specially sa amin ng Daddy nya. I am praying na tama ang ginagawa ko for him to grow up na mabuting tao.

Some Plans failed 2016

2016 has 19 days left.

Wait what??

19 days??

Oh men! Time flies really fast. It's as if my mind is still in July when I was planning how to build our Emergency Fund. Well, thinking about it now makes me a little sad but then, I know that the change of priorities was a greater idea.

If you haven't read about my plan on building a small amount of fund to start with, I wrote about it in August. I actually read it again before I started this entry and I realized, what a great plan I had in mind. Unfortunately, the execution of the plan was the real challenge.

So what has changed? 

 Back in September, I thought about buying a gas range. My baking business was growing day by day that I am having a hard time accommodating orders that are coming. I have my maximum of 12 pieces Yema Cakes that I could bake from 7am-11am. Some days requires 24 pieces of Yema cake and as much as I want to commit, I was really having a hard time. My full time job got affected somehow and I have to even choose which is which. Of course I wouldn't want to quit my day job only because I am happy with it. But then, baking is where my heart is so I know I wouldn't want to give up on it too. The next option I have in mind was to buy a much bigger oven. I was using a Hanabishi 30L Convection Oven and that could only accommodate 6pcs of llanera. I was aiming to bake 12pcs in a batch to cut the time required for baking.

Decision. 

Finally, I have decided to buy a White WestingHouse Gas Range with 62L oven. I was so glad with the purchase although I was hoping it could accommodate one whole batch of Yema Cake. It wasn't but then it really helped with my baking. I was able to cut the labor time for making the cake with the help of my convection oven. With this new endeavor, I failed to save for my emergency fund further as I have to borrow money to make this happen. I also bought a stand mixer to go with the new oven since my hand mixer cannot keep up with the orders.

Failing to Think Ahead. 

Rather than using all of my savings to make this purchase, I decided to borrow money from a friend which ended up making my budget tighter. Because of this, I was so afraid to compute my weekly budget because I know it will surely go to negative and will only stress myself more. The first few months of having this new gas range helped me cope up with the bills and expenses. I knew I made the right decision. Although I invested money for my business without enough fund, I knew it was okay until sad events happened. Nanay had to be confined in the hospital making it hard for us to bake and deliver cakes as no one will look after Jami. I also let relatives to borrow money that ending up me having to shoulder some of the installment at some point. That took a toll on our expenses that I felt it will be really hard for me to come back up. I was paying for my own loan while paying for someone else too.


How Could I let this Happen?

I was blaming myself all the time although I couldn't say I had a depression. It was far from that and I am thankful I had my own family to stand on me on these events. I also had friends whom I could vent out too when it was too much to handle. I was thinking negatively that it will be really hard for me to go back on track. I knew how it felt having debts but I let it happen again. Jami's birthday came and that I had nothing. It was so sad that I had to incur more debts just to cover up the losses I had in the process.

Turning Point.

When Nanay recovered, I had the chance to start selling cakes again. Our 13th month pay came and I used it all to cover most of them. I know I don't need a new phone, a camera, new clothes or shoes. I know these things could wait. I could say I can finally see the light. I am 98% clear with debts and I could budget our money even more. I am now trying my best to plan our meals ahead of time to save more money than buying ready cooked meals or even fast food. With home cooked meals, I could save 100 pesos daily since I no longer have to buy food while in the office. I started listing down all of my expenses again and trying my best to separate my sideline's money to my personal money to avoid it being spent unnecessarily.

What Now?

Jami's about to go to school next year so I have to make sure I have funds for that. I don't want to incur any more debts. I am starting over with my financial journey in building the fund with a new strategy and I am hoping I could see it work in the coming days. Daryl also had the chance to undergo a training in Naia T3 and I was crossing my finger that we could hear a positive feedback after the holidays. Speaking of the holidays, goodies are so in demand so I am expecting a higher amount of orders in the coming weeks. With the new strategy that I am talking about, instead of taking off 20-30% to savings, I would lower it to 10% for now until I could fully recover. I have then decided to get all my baking profits into savings automatically which allow us a higher chance of saving more. With that, I'll be able to see the savings growing higher than usual. I am praying this could be done according to my plan before the year ends - or so I say, 2 weeks from now. =) Am I happy? Yes! Happier than ever. Thank God for all the struggles, I am standing up tall and proud this time. =)

I Almost Lost Jami

It’s the first of December guys! I hope everyone is having a good days forward.. Uhm! Alam na ang mga 13^th month pay! Hahahaha!

Anyway, I would like to share what I have experienced on fine day in the mall with friends and our babies.

Last Month, my friends in high school decided to have a mini reunion. It was all girls (except Jef who’s a girl at heart) with our babies. It was a fun and tiring afternoon chasing our kids and sharing every mommy moments we had. I sure missed these girls and I can’t believe we were now Mommies. The last time we met were couple of years ago and most of us doesn’t have kids yet. To think that we are now Mommies is overwhelming.

Anyway, we have decided to go home around 9pm and returned all the carts that we rented. The last one we had was mine since sa labas ko ng mall ni-rent yung cart. Besides, most of my friends were with me since same way lang kami and that they could ride with us going home. I spoke with Daryl on the phone and was so mad dahil hindi kami magkaintindihan kung saan kami magkikita. Daryl is so forgetful and that annoys me a lot. Yung tipong hindi nya alam yung mga lugar na pinupuntahan namin. He’s not like me na kapag dinala mo sa isang lugar, I can go back there alone. Yun bang matandain ako sa mga lugar and directions. He was a complete opposite and it annoys me so much na minsan naisip ko baka nananadya lang. Going back, we have decided na he’ll be waiting for me in front of the mall na lang. After speaking to him, I held Jami who was playing with my friend’s kids. I asked him to ride on the cart ulit so we could go home na while I was fixing our bag at the same time, I was speaking to my friend as to where they were going home. They have decided to stay a little longer sa mall kasi while the others, sasabay sa akin. All I know was Jami went back to the cart and rode as I instructed him pero nung itutulak ko na yung cart, he’s not there.

Me: Hala! Asan yung anak ko?

My other friends doesn’t have a clue either since they were trying to listen to me and our other friends’ conversation. I started looking and I was shouting on top of my lungs so that Jami could hear me.

Me: DWYANE!!!!!

There were times na tinatawag ko talaga sya on his first name specially if I am mad at him.

We were on the side of ice skating rink in Mall of Asia (in front of Surplus). There were some stalls of sale clothing from Department store so I kept on looking for him on that area. Dun kasi kami naghahabulan and the other kids earlier. I was thinking baka nagtatago lang sa mga clothe racks pero wala talaga.

My friends started helping me and shouting his name din.

In that moment, I was thinking it’s not happening. That he’s just anywhere there and that I just have to look for him. Pero wala, it took couple of seconds before everything registered to my mind that Jami is indeed missing. Parang gusto kong mahimatay at that time. Naiiyak na agad ako since I don’t know where to start. I don’t exactly know kung saan sya nag suot since walang nakakita sa kanya. Thinking about how big Mall of Asia is, that makes me more nervous.

I was starting to palpitate and cry when I heard my friend who called me and said that Jami was found.

I saw a lady guard carrying him going inside the mall. LUMABAS PALA SYA NG MALL!!!

There was an exit kasi and that it was a street where cars come and go. I didn’t realize that he went out of the mall. Jami was so kilig playing with other kids that he ran outside dahil naghahabulan sila. I felt mixed emotions when my friend took him from the lady guard and approached me. Jami still looked happy since he didn’t realize what just happened. Akala nya they’re still playing. I was so mad pinagalitan ko sya and said he was bad because he left Mommy, that he ran and didn’t wait for Mommy, he will no longer have Mommy kapag ginawa pa nya yun.  He then realized that I was mad kaya mejo sad din sya pero all along, masayang –masaya talaga sya. It wasn’t the first time that we were out in the mall na kaming dalawa lang. Madaming-madaming beses na and this never happened. I don’t know what came into my mind at that moment and why I missed looking after him. It all happened in 2 minutes or less.

I almost cried na. Buti na lang he was found agad or else baka mahimatay na talaga ako. I am sure all mommies can relate to what I felt and that it was one scary thing, iniisip mo pa lang, nakakatakot na. Ang kinatatakutan ko talaga is if someone take him because I will never ever get to see him. I remember a documentary showed on GMA that a mother lost his child and it has been 3 years, he was never found. Someone saw his child carried by someone going out of their street. His child is not even crying so the witness didn’t think that the child is being taken by another person. Diba?? I can’t sleep for days after that at hinding-hindi ko talaga mapapatawad ang sarili ko if something like that happened to him. It was a good several nights that I kept thinking what ifs. I hugged Jami one night and whispered “Wag ka aalis ha, wag mo iiwan si Mommy”.

I was so paranoid that after the incident, I promised myself not to lose my focus on Jami. He has to be the first priority above all.

I really thank God that Jami was found. I oath not to have this kind of things happening in the future. So help me God.

Dear Jami,

This was the very first time that I almost lost you while we’re out in the mall. I can’t believe it! I thought Mommy was so vigilant and that I will never ever miss a single second without looking at you at whatever you want to do or wherever you want to go. I guess Mommy get distracted at times. I was really glad that you are still with me. I don’t know what I’ll do without you, Anak. I was so scared and I was hoping everything was just a dream. God pitied us and you were found immediately. Buti na lang, nothing bad happened to you. I promise to focus on you when we’re out. Nowadays, kahit naglalakad lang tayo going to your favorite tindahan na binibilhan natin ng small eggs, I was looking at you while walking. Minsan kasi sobrang bagal mo, you want to walk alone so minsan nahuhuli ka. I kept on calling you “Dwyane.. Jami.. Common, bilis.” So you’ll be remained focus that you should follow me. If you’re gone too far (2 feet away), I would wait for you or would chase you so we could walk together na lang. I want you to be independent because I know you have a strong personality and can handle things yourself. Still, I want you to know that Mommy will always be here and that I won’t get tired in chasing you. I love you baby.. Mommy and Daddy love you so much! =)

Jami's Sick

Hi guys, sorry for not posting any updates ha?! I was kinda busy with crochet kasi eh. hehehe! I was so addicted to it so instead of taking photos of the things I'll be blogging about, nauuwi sa pagko crochet. hehehe!

Aside from that, Jami is really getting sickly nowadays. Probably because of the weather na din natin - sobrang init sa tanghali then uulan sa gabi. Last month, he got sick. He had fever with colds. We also took him to ER in San Juan De dios Hospital to make sure that he wasn't sick because of his really big bukol sa noo. He was so makulit so nahulog ata sa bed ni Tita Frualene nya. We were told naman that the interval of his bukol and his fever was a little far away na to consider it being critical. We weren't asked to have CT scan na because his activity never changed. He was sick because of colds so viral lang naman.

He got better after couple of days pero he got sick na naman last week. He had cough naman after his colds. His cough looks worst pero the doc said that his lungs are clear so mainly bacterial daw. WE bought the prescribed antibiotic that he'll take for the next 7 days starting today. I am hoping that he'll get better anytime soon.

What makes me really sad is, sobrang laki ng pinayat ni Jami. I can see his bones na bumabakat na sa katawan nya. One thing that doesn't change is his weight. It stays the same kahit sobrang pigil sa pagdede dahil sa kakaubo nya. That's my reference na lang not to get to panic since he maintains his weight.

We had our check up yesterday and good thing he's not getting fever na. Again, we were given antibiotics now, meds for cough and anti-histamine. When his colds gets worst, we'll give him meds for colds na. Nakakaawa because he doesn't want to drink his meds but I insist, mas nakakaawa kasi kapag hindi nakainom ng gamot eh. Jami was so clingy din. Wala ng ginawa kung

Jami: "Mommy.. Mommy... Sama.. Sama... Mameeeeee.... Hug.. Hug.. Hug" (repeat 100x).

Honestly, I am tired pero I loved it. Very demanding nya and always looking for me. Malayo lang ng slight, tumayo lang, "Mommy, Si dan (sit down)". I know sooner or later, ayaw na magpa baby nyan so habang feel na feel pa nya, pagbigyan. Hehe =)

That's all for now and I promise to show you my artwork. hehe! See you guys soon!

Terrible Two Jami - A Start

Sorry guys ha?! I was not able to blog a lot nowadays because I lost my phone. I don't have a tool to take photos so mejo lie low muna tayo. My plan was to buy a smartphone (Samsung) or I'll have a small phone for texts and calls then I'll have Ipad na lang since I'll be using it for blogging and photos. Anyway, wala pa naman budget so it's too early to decide. Hehehe!

I miss instagram a lot na.. Huhu! Kung kelan naman nag eenjoy na ako sa gamit nya, saka naman ako nawalan ng phone. Follow nyo ko ha? @itsmommyjen

So eto na nga, what I want to blog about today was about Jami.

This weekend that passed, we stayed at home so we could take a rest. Jami just got sick last week and ayoko naman na mag umpisa na naman ng byahe. Everyday kasi, dinadala yan ng Daddy nya to their hometown tapos dun nya inaalagaan. I can't get the difference of taking care of his son sa bahay.

Men.

Anyway, I had a good 48 hours to study Jami's behavior - a little. I didn't notice that something has changed to Jami. Akala ko kasi because he was not feeling well at kagagaling lang sa sakit so he must have been really grumpy.

Yesterday, I noticed that Jami shouts a lot.

Jami: Mameee...... Mameee.... 

He was calling me and would stop until I answer back. He was shouting on top of his lungs. I thought it was normal or he was just trying to catch my attention, fine.

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Jami was playing when he notice something that he wants to get from me. Say for example a pen, I wanted to write about our expenses when he would go to me and would take the pen away while saying..

Jami: Sulat.. sulat.. 
Me: No, wait. Mommy muna. 
Jami: Sulaaaaaaaaattttttt!!!!!!!!!!

Then would sit down on the floor while crying. I will do my best to make amo and would give the pen (which I do have the intention to give the pen in the first place, I was just trying to finish what I was writing about) but he won't accept. Maglulupasay sa sahig while crying and won't give in to anything that I'll say to him.

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There was also a time when he was playing with his toy cars, I was in front of netbook checking my facebook account when he would cry and would give his toys to me. He was blabbering and I can't understand what he wants me to do. When I touched the cars, it was wet. Sinubo nya pala sa bibig nya out of his annoyance to the toy.

Since the toy was wet because of his laway,

Me: Okay, pupunasan ko na yung toys oh. Punas.. Punas.. while rubbing a cloth to his toy.

When I gave the toy back, he was fine and continued playing with the car.

After 30 seconds, he would cry again while giving his toy to me. I have to make sure it's all dried up then would give it back, he'll play with it and would cry again.

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Last Sunday night when we were inside Amber in Las Pinas, we were waiting for our dinner to be served. He was seated in one of their high chair while I was watching what he was doing. He was playing with coins when he shouted really loud. The lady who was 3 chairs away from us looked at us with an annoyed face. I looked at her with a questioning face as to why she was annoyed. Hahaha! Oh dear, I can't wait for the day that we'll be in the mall and Jami would throw tantrums. I could already hear people's judgement and those annoying look.

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This morning, he was crying again when I asked kung anong gusto nya. He was just crying and won't tell me what's the matter. When I checked him, may poop pala so I told him we'll go to bathroom.

Jami: Noooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!! (with matching lupasay at nagpapabigat so I would have a hard time carrying him to the bathroom)

He didn't win. I took him to the bathroom so his Daddy could wash his pwet. I was dressed for work na kasi.

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Out of all these.. I had a conclusion that Jami is starting a "Terrible Two" stage. I had previously read some articles about this stage and I didn't know it was true until I had Jami who was doing it now. Honestly, I feel a little hopeless. I have read that toddlers undergo this stage and they throw tantrums since they can't communicate well yet. They don't know how to express their feelings properly which always ends up on tantrums. I was torn between understanding Jami's feelings and try to view things on his own eyes without spoiling him. I don't want to make him feel naman that whatever it is that he likes, he'll gets. I want to limit the no's because I want him to experience his surroundings but I also don't want to risk that he would be so spoiled he knows that I am powerless.

I talked to Daryl last night and explain about terrible two. I know Jami is close to that stage and it's starting. I told Daryl to calm down when Jami is throwing tantrums and calmly ask him what he wants. I also told him to observe Jami closely since they will be together most of the time.

Here are the things that I am doing so far.

1.) Ask. Based on what I read, they cry because they can't communicate what they want to tell you.

I always ask him "Bakit?" or "Bakit ka umiiyak?" "Ano yun?" "Anong gusto mo?" Most often than not, he would answer with a cry but still, I ask him.. Like this instance..

Jami was crying.

Me: Bakit? Anong gusto mo? Sad ka ba? Sad??
Jami: Indi (Hindi or No) 

I think I have to tell him how to say what he feels. Like happy, sad, hurt etc.

This morning inside the car, he was sitting on my lap when he started crying again.

Jami: Pusod.. pusod..
Me: Bakit ano yun? Pusod? (then I covered his tummy with his sando)

He hugged me and stayed like that for around 5 minutes. I asked him if masakit ang tummy but he didn't answer. When I asked him to sit on my lap again, pinapalaiit nya yung tummy nya then I had an idea that his tummy aches. Kaya pala he was saying "Pusod". Hayy..

2.) Calm.

I always try my best to calm down when cries or shouts a lot. Pero there were times na I start to think na maybe it's too much na and he might grow spoiled naman. OMG, ang hirap lang.

3.) Talk.

There were times that Jami would be so grumpy I would talk to him. I would hold his face so his attention will be at me then I would start talking saying "diba sabi ko be good ka lang?" then he would start to cry a little as if he's trying to defend what he did. I don't know if he understood what I said pero at least, I tried my best to communicate. Hehe.

So yan, mga bakla. Yan lang muna ginagawa ko today. I don't know yet if this works pero I am hoping that this will past and Jami would not be spoiled naman. =)

Kayo? Any tips?.. =)

Enjoy the rest of your week. =)

I Lost My Phone This Morning

I am feeling under the weather today.

I woke up because Nanay was asking where my phone was. I was too sleepy pa so I said, "anjan lang".

She said Kuya's phone was missing daw so I better look for mine. When I checked where I placed it last night (partially under my pillow), it was not there. I thought Daryl used it the night before when I was asleep since he tends to surf the net before going to sleep. He checked where he usually put it but to no avail. We started searching for the bed since I always, always sleep with my phone. Unfortunately, it wasn't there.

Nanay said that Kuya's phone was nowhere to be found too.

We were robbed.

Pinagtali-tali namin ang story and we came up that the suspect got hold of our gadgets from our window.

source

Our window was like that. Nanay put a soft net to cover the window so to make sure na hindi basta papasok ang mga insects or even dust from outside. She said, when she woke up, the net was rolled down on one side and the windows were open wide when she or my brother was able to close it a bit because it rained hard that night before Daryl and I arrived home.Our bed, from where we were sleeping, was slightly close to the side of the window. It's perpendicular to the wall where the window was. Thinking about it, if that person would want to hurt me, he could have done so because my head was really close to the window. Same as my brother who was sleeping near the other window in our sala.

Kuya's phone was placed in one of the television shelves where he usually put it when he sleeps. He said that he charged it before going to sleep but when he woke up, he was left with a charger na lang. He went outside and to our window to see if the shelf was reachable from the outside, and yes, it was.

They tried calling my brother's phone and it rang. Someone picked up the call and dropped it after 3 hello's from my sister. We tried mine but the night before, it was critically low battery so by this time, I know it was fully battery drained.

We're in this apartment for 2 years now. It wasn't the first time that it rained for sure. It wasn't also the first time that we left the windows slightly open. What was really mind blowing was, how could be an outsider know where we put our phones when we sleep. Yes, it might be common sense that people would sleep with their phones. My point is, I put my phone anywhere. It could be under the bed, above, under my pillow or Jami's pillow. Literally everywhere. My brother might have been placing his phone from the same spot but the things is, it was dark inside our house at night because all lights were closed except from our comfort room (where the door is slightly closed to completely closed to dim the lights further). Both phones were black so how the hell he found where it was placed? We have a speculation na baka nagmamasid na sa bahay everyday without us knowing. It's bizarre also that our dog didn't bark in a presence of an unknown person. Well, tumatahol ang aso namin kahit sinong pumasok basically lalo na if he heard voices. We don't know if it's raining hard last night that blinded our dogs sense of smell, and ears. 

Kuya wasn't really worried because he had a Cherry Mobile Flare and he was able to back up all files. At the same time, he has a spare company phone. I didn't feel sad at first since the phone was a bit old and I have been planning to replace it since last month. Most of the apps there were outdated even IG. That's the reason I can't post videos or even repost. What made me really feel sad now was about the pictures and videos of Jami. I had plenty of them on my phone and it has been almost a year since the last time I synced it on my netbook. The later was broken so I have all the files kept on my phone for the mean time. I felt I lost Jami's half year because all of his video went missing. I wanted to cry. He had videos there when he was only 10 months when he was starting to communicate loudly. There were some videos he specifically look for when he got hold of my phone like "Ball" when he was inside ball of pool of in Austin Land, SM Southmall. He would also look for "siso" (seesaw) when he was riding a toy car inside Timezone. He also has a video of him singing so loudly and adorably one fine afternoon.

I failed to back up all the files since for me it's so matrabaho and I don't have time to do so. Those were the things that I failed to upload on my facebook account nor IG because of slow internet connection.

What to do now? I was so mad because I lost most precious things - Jami's progress that was witnessed by my old phone. If I could just ask the robber to just leave the files and the SIM card and take the phone, I'll be happy too. I don't need the phone, kanya na isaksak nya sa baga nya! Nakakainis lang because the value of that phone doesn't even match the files inside it! I have done my best to log in to my microsoft account so to see if somehow some of the photos or videos were backed up pero I can't remember the password I put into. It was still tied up in my phone number and said they will call me me with a code pero how I can I answer naman kung wala sakin ang phone. I don't want to give up for those files but how could I get it back. I don't know what to do =(

Bakit ba may mga taong ganyan! They don't realize that it wasn't the material things that matters to you, it was those precious times you had with your loved ones na andun sa cellphone na yun. I am so pissed knowing that I won't be able to watch all the videos I took and kept for God knows why then suddenly, kukunin lang ng mga walang kwentang tao! I know I am being emotional pero that's what matters to me! I don't know if Jami would sing the same way he did when I video-ed it. He would surely not cry and smile the way he did when he was toothless. I know I have plenty of those to capture in the coming years pero bakit di man lang ako binigyan ng warning? Sana man lang nailipat ko ang files sa hard drive!!

To the person who took my precious memories,

Ma- tegi ka na sana, now na!

Morbid. 

Weight Issues 2015

You know guys.. I am just really worried nowadays.

I came to realize na sobrang laki na nag tinaba ko after ko manganak!

Gossshhh... I am really worried.

Alam mo yung feeling na you know what to do pero parang may napigil sayo in doing something?

hayy.. Okay! Last friday, I tried watching the same exercise video that I watched back in the days. Yun yung time na dalaga pa ako. Whenever I feel bloated, I'll go watch and dance with it.

Anyway, yun nga. I watched it nung Friday. I danced for only 10 minutes lang which is basically the first part of the video. More of stretching lang. I don't want to go all out naman agad - agad dahil baka himatayin ako diba?! hahaha. I mean baka lang di kayanin ng katawan ko dahil hindi naman ako nag wo work out for the longest time.

I remember during the days that I posted about my weight issues here last year. That was when I still had the reason that I have just given birth and have undergone CS so I can't force myself to go payat pa.

But now, Ow-Em-Gee talaga!!

I came to realize it this Saturday that passed. I went to Metro Gaisano in Alabang so Nanay could finish her passport application that has been at work since May. While waiting, (I can't go up to DFA because I don't have appointments and Nanay isn't senior citizen yet), I roamed around on the same floor and found cute stuff. I also came across a huge mirror and thought of having my OOTD shot taken there.

Ayun.. na surprise ako!

Gaaahhhdd!! I want to cry talaga. I am so mataba. Ang laki ng braso at ng tummy. Well, my tummy was hidden because I am wearing something flowy and maluwag sa may bandang tummy but what surprises me ng bongga was my braso! Huhuhu! Nakakainis lang. I was so shocked and came to thinking na napabayaan ko na ang sarili ng bonggacious talaga mga ateng!

You know I have never been the skinny one. My puson has always been bigger than my tummy and tummy was noticeable too pero hindi naman sobrang laki na parang buntis. Yung tipong may baby fats lang talaga. Chubby kasi talaga ako and never in my entire life na nagkaron ng flat tummy na pang two piece sa beach. I accepted that. I mean, hindi ko din naman bet ang mag panty sa beach so keri na ang pekpek shorts.

Just to give you a hint.. Here's what my body type is..

This is the most recent photo that I took na somehow shows my body, hindi lang puro fez. The top I am wearing is loose kaya hindi halatang malaki ang tyan ko jan. Although I love the jeans kasi fit na fit sa mga hita ko, I felt sexy jan because I was wearing a nice fitting jeans and a top na naitatago ang braso at tummy ko. Pero when I was a dalaga pa, I don't wear this kind of top kasi nga malaki. Lalo akong tataba tingnan dahil sa boob area ko so I opt to wear yung mga fitting talaga na damit. Yung as in hapit sa katawan para kita ang curves.. (Naks! Maka curves talaga! Hahah!)

Nowadays, puro fez ko na lang ang pinapakita ko kasi nakakahiya naman makita pa pati mga bilbilations ko diba? Gaaahd pag naaalala ko, naiiyak talaga ako! I felt so mataba! Huhu! 

Teka, wala naman akong problema sa matataba ha? baka sabihin nio naman echusera ako. Pero kasi what made my feeling worst is that, hindi ko na alam ang size ko when I go shopping. I want to fit all sizes para alam ko kung ano bang kukunin kong size next time. I used to go shopping without fitting the damit 70% of the time. I know my size and by just looking at the clothes, alam ko na kung kasya sakin o hindi. 

This Sunday that passed, Daryl and I along with Jami went to SM Mall of Asia so I can buy some stuff for my DIY letter standee. I have a hidden agenda to go to Terranova to check what they have there. I did some sshopping in their SM Southmall 2 weeks ago so I want to know kung mas madami silang stock there since mas malaki ang store in SM Mall of Asia. When I got there, I grabbed all the clothes that I want in sizes XS, S, and M. Terrranova carries big sizes kasi so I was wondering kung anong size ko. Of course depende din sa kung anong tela diba? I took around 8 different clothes (dresses, jeans, tops) and fit them all. 

I.CAN'T.DECIDE!!

I feel na kasya sakin ang XS pero mukha akong buntis. The Small fits well pero bakat pa din ang tyan ko. Medium hides my belly pero I look mas mataba. =(

I want to wear fitting clothes again!! =( Like this..

Yung kahit ganyan na lang masya na ako eh.. huhuhu! =(

Yung makapag high waisted shorts ng hindi panget because of my bilbil =(

Yung hindi naman nakakahiyang ipagyabang ang braso at tummy diba?!

Parang pangarap na lang tong photo na 'to! huhu!

Anyway, hindi pa naman ako nawawalan ng pag-asa eh. Alam ko kaya to! Mind set lang mga ateng!! Balik Alindoghalfyear2015. Push ko yan this week! So help me God! =)

Any tips and tricks??